• E. Young

Does He Know You WANT Him?

Recently hubby love told me that I never want to have sex with him, and that is just not true at all!!!





I wake up, brush my teeth, and head downstairs to make my hubby breakfast. I then make his lunch; we pray and he’s out the door. All this, before 7am. I then wake the kiddos, make their breakfast, teach their school lessons, make lunch, REST and RESET, make dinner, help with homework, have dinner with the family. Next comes chores, baths, showers, and bedtime for the littles. Lastly, we slide into bed and one or both of us end up snoring as soon as our heads hit the pillow. (snoring, just an expression, because I don’t snore 😉) I’m sure not every woman’s schedule looks exactly like mine, but with some variation, you know what I’m talking about. When exactly did you notice any time to be intimate or get down and dirty with the hubby?


In Between Time


Well, my response to my husband’s assumption that I never want to have sex with him was… “Are you kidding me! I ALWAYS want you!” He believed nothing of which I spoke, and I was appalled.

You see, there are moments throughout my day that I want hubby love so bad. I still even get those little butterflies just thinking about him sometime. TMI? Just wait, there is a point to my story!

Yet, when he gets home from work, and the kids go to bed, both of us are sometimes so exhausted. All we are able to do is look at each other as our eyes bat to stay open as we fall fast asleep.

But yes, honey, I wanted him at least 12 times today and at least 8 yesterday. However, I can understand why our husbands would think that we didn’t want them constantly. And for them to think for a minute that we don’t WANT them, is a dangerous place to be.


The World WANTS Him


My hubby, like so many out there, is a good man. He gets up early, works all day, and spends time with the family at night. He leads us in devotional, prays, and tells us all goodnight. He tucks in the little ones and cuddles with me until we fall asleep. And guess what????? I had you at “Hello!” What do I mean by that?

There are many women out there who don’t need to know that our husbands eat dinner with the family, or cuddles with us at night. All they need to know is that he’s married and that is enough for them. Just knowing that there is a woman that he’s committed to, means that he is a good catch and its time to prove to that man that she would be a BETTER wife. It’s time to show him, that she WANTS him more!

Listen ladies, the single ‘thirsty” woman cares not that he’s married, or has kids, or a dog named Ruff. All she cares about are her wants, her needs, and her desires. She wants to be wifed up just as bad as the next woman and YOUR husband has already proven to be a GREAT catch!

With that said, we can’t EVER have our husbands thinking for one minute, that we don’t WANT him more than any woman ever will!


How Do We Assure Him?


We tell them…. Often!

I never want for my husband to think that because we have 8 kids, 7 still at home, work, ministry, and life, that my desire for him has dwindled. Neither should you! So, I decided the only way for him to be assured of that, is to tell him!

In the world today, technology is everywhere. Really, I’m not much of a fan, but I do appreciate some of its little perks. One perk are these ingenious methods called text messaging and video messaging. No matter what anybody is doing at any given moment, you can reach out and touch them! Even if they are busy at the exact moment we send a message, they can read or watch it at their convenience. AWESOME!

Whenever we have a thought about our hubby loves, we can message them. Tell them the thought with as much detail as we possibly can. Sometimes, I send two or three messages before he even responds. And that’s ok. Most of husbands work out of the home. All they need to know is that you WANT them, and that is the goal.

This also does not always lead to adult playtime after work, dinner, showers, and the littles bedtime. But, he knows that I have a desire for him amongst everything that this married life throws at us.


Reasons Why He NEEDS to know You WANT Him


  1. Self confidence - Men need to be wanted by their wives to boost their confidence. They want to feel like 'the man'. Since he's your man, that is your job to remind him that he is 'THE MAN'!

  2. Companionship - When we reassure our hubby's that we want them, it also reminds them of the companionship they already have at home. If he is secure in his companionship with us, then the temptation of having companionship outside of the marriage shouldn't be able to overtake him.

  3. To Be Needed - Who doesn't have a need to be needed. This is why when children move out and leave parents to be empty nesters, the parents have a hard time. Because they feel they are no longer needed. Same for our hubby's. He needs to know that you NEED him. He needs to know that he is the only one who can fulfill your marital needs. That is his role in the marriage, right... to take care of his wife. If he doesn't feel like you WANT him, he doesn't feel like 'the man' who is taking care of business.

Men need to be wanted by their wives to boost their confidence.

Married couples, especially ones with kiddos, normally don’t have the ‘incredible’ sex lives like those fake marriages we see on tv or the big movie screen (pre covid). You know the ones that are never interrupted by morning breath, crying babies, or gas from the cheesy potatoes they had for dinner. Everything goes as planned. So epic, that they both must have a cigarette afterwards.


Yea, NO…. not REAL!!!


Yet, we must find ways and moments to keep the spark alive. We must find creative ways to be intimate when we can’t be physical. And if using these ingenious technology methods of messaging to keep the flame burning is one path we are able to use, I say kudos to technology for helping us wives to be able to always at any time express to our hubby loves how bad we WANT them! Happy Messaging!!!


Be Faithful, Be Free

E. Young

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