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  • Writer's pictureE. Young

Let them ask their husbands at home!

I love the word, and I love listening to the word being preached over me by one of the pastors at our church. I love being in the sanctuary, worshipping with my brothers and sisters in Christ. One thing that used to sometimes make me a little frustrated, however, was when my baby would start to cry, or need to be picked up from the nursery in the middle of the message. I would always want my husband to go and take care of the baby and would sometimes be resentful when he wouldn’t. I needed what it was the pastor was preaching! Boy, were my thoughts on roles in this area a little skewed.

A desire for the things of God

1 Corinthians 14:35 says “if there is anything that they(women) desire to learn, let them ask their husbands at home…” Now, I know what you strong bible believing, ‘I could teach the word to the masses’, ‘my theology is better than yours’, women are saying! You are saying “how dare you say that I can’t go to church to learn the word. I have just as much right as a man to learn God’s word also!”. Or something like that. Well, I am not telling you that you cannot learn the word. I am not telling you that you don’t need to go to church to hear the word. I am not telling you that you must stay at home and only listen to what your husband is telling you about the word. I am saying that we wives are to learn more closely from the pastors (our husbands) that the Lord has placed over us. I am saying that it is far more important for your husband to receive the word directly over you.

Yea, I know that stings, and again, I am not at all saying that it is not important for us women to receive the word. Really, I am going to let the word say it.

1 Corinthians 11:3 – “the head of every man is Christ, and the head of the woman is man, and the head of Christ is God”. God’s word tells us that there is an order, and in this order, the man is head of the woman. Your husband is head over you. Scripture also tells us that Christ is the direct head over man. Normally when a person works under a boss, that boss needs to speak to that person directly. That boss does not need to call the spouse of that person to tell them to learn it for that person, then give that person all the information about what the boss said. Confusing, isn’t it? I am saying the same thing. The Lord does not need us wives to get it first to give to our husbands. He wants the man, who is directly in submission to Him to get it and then give it to us wives. The Lord has an awesome way of working things out in the best order for our lives.

My husband is not a pastor!

Yes, I get it, your husband may not be an ordained pastor, preaching in the pulpit at your local church. However, he IS the shepherd of the flock (your family) that the Lord has called him to be over. He is the one that the Lord believes will lead you to the cross. He is the one who you are to learn from. Which then poses the question, who does he learn from? Yes, you guessed it! He learns from God! He learns through the pastor who is teaching on Sunday mornings. He learns from the bible, which the pastor who is teaching is telling him to read. How can he lead you if he is not being led.

When we women think to ourselves that we need the word more than our husband does, because we are more spiritual than he is, we are saying that God’s order is wrong. We are saying that we are the spiritual leaders of our homes and it’s ok for our husbands to miss some of the message to take the baby out or to pick the baby up from the nursery. We are saying that we would rather the pastor of the church be our pastor than our husbands. That is OUT OF ORDER!

My husband doesn’t even listen when he’s in church!

My husband used to fall asleep in church, and I would get so angry. I would cry to the Lord about how my husband does not lead me, and how I knew more than him when it came to the word. Well, my hubby stopped falling asleep in church. He started paying attention, taking notes, and today he is one of the pastors at our church!

Leave that up to the Lord. Your husband is hearing everything that he needs to hear. It may have been one sentence and it may have been one word, but the Lord can work with crooked sticks and make them straight. He does not need us to help Him with anything. He sure does not need us to get more of the word through the teaching of the pastor so that we can be taken care of spiritually. He has given you that already. Through His word. He gave you His bible that you can devour every day, several times a day. He gave you other lady friends that you can have a bible study with to go deeper in the word with. He gave you older women who can disciple you in His word. He also gave you your husband who can teach you. God has your spiritual growth covered. He promises to not leave you or forsake you. But please do not hinder the growth of your husband because you are unhappy with Gods perfect plan. I get that we are in a time of women empowerment, but ladies, please hear me when I say…. You are the one who the Lord has called to nurture your babies. I am not saying that your husband can never get up and grab the kiddos or rock the baby during church, I am saying that your husband is there to provide and teach and be present. When the baby cries in church, joyfully step out and ask the Lord to increase the hearing capacity of your husband to His glorious word so that when you get home you can ask a hundred and one questions about the sermon, and he will be able to teach you what it was that he learned at church today. How glorious a day that would be, to learn from your husband about your God!!!

Be Faithful, Be Free

E. Young

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