How many times do say to your wife, "You decide", or "It's up to you", "I don’t care." or every man's favorite, "It doesn't matter"?
I hear you fellas! I'm tired, it’s been a long day and if I can be honest, I really don't care. I love my family; I love spending time with my wife and kids but sometimes the plans or decisions don't matter to me at that moment. This is our (mine included) reality.
Sad, but the truth is, that we as husbands and fathers give up any iota of responsibility the first chance we get. Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat! Mind blowing right?
We spend a good deal of time making sure our wife, our kids, our family and our friends know that we are the "head" or the one "in charge". But Are We? If we take a minute to really look at what our actions/words show..... let's see:
You decide- I don'tcare.
It's up to you- You decide because I don't care.
I don't care- Crazy but, I don't care. (strange that means that)
It doesn’t matter- Nothing will satisfy and I don't care. (I’m exaggerating the I don't care but, do we? I would argue, maybe not)
Pretty heavy, but my point is not to beat us over the head on where we've fallen short, but to open our eyes to what we’ve said and that what we say matters. How we feel impacts our families and especially our wives. Our families want, no, need our input and our guidance (and not in a Fidel Castro kind of way but like Jesus, loving, kind, graceful, with confidence and considering the whole)
Men, we can all be better leaders and lovers of our families. Let’s replace "You decide" with I have an Idea, It's up to you with This is what I was thinking, what are you thinking(always with others in mind), "I don’t care" with Anything that shows you care because that response is lazy of us! And lastly, replace "It doesn’t matter" with a response that shows they matter, that they always matter. Remembering, not only they matter but to them you matter more, your input, your ideas, your love, your guidance, your wisdom and your presence, matter!